where butter can fly...

at home today doing my "Making it Big" assignment.... haiya... it's a drag... just want to finish it quickly yet i cant really focus... Heavy head, heavy eyes and fan full blasting infront of me (cos it is a humid and hot day today).... It is only me n my dad at home and i cant help to observe him and smile... My dad's new chair came today. One with those back support function. Lol... finally he bought smth for himself... i think he considered like more than half a year, go around matching prices and finally settled for this one that he is sitting on right now. He is so excited bt the chair that he brought the whole family to try on it before he finally pay for it. And it is so obvious that he has been waiting for his chair to arrive the entire morning. Lolz.. even called the person up when the chair havent arrived at the appointed time. While the chair is here now... and he is all smiles... just like a child getting smth he really likes... haa... i never thought my dad will be like that too...

well... i m still stuck in my assignment... so shag... i dunno how to do... how to do!?

I am so happy we are not last for the last round of cesim!... haha... n not second last either... but 3rd last... quite satisfied with it although still below average... so the last minute effort was actually not wasted. Yeah!
so settled with that... now... it is tmr presentation... hahaa... that derivatives presentation lah... throw face!... and now we are all troubling whether to wear formal... sigh~... i really hate presenting.

This saturday, we will be bringing our shoes closet to fort canning... a bit excited yet worried that there wun be any crowd and will make all the efforts wasted... and will feel disappointed. but this is pessimistic thinking... i just hope dreams come true...

haha... n i m happy that XX got attached...
so the probability to hearing ones unhappiness over the phone is reduced... linking to me being less irritated as well... thank u so much...
really not in the mood to share the burden of unhappiness of anyone right now... and being disinterested doesnt mean i m "bad"... people like to used that word to describe...

i m just being a little selfish temporary...
need some time to organise my life...

haf been quarrelling wif my dad rather frequently again... and i m really angri... just couldnt get it.. wat is wrong wif him... i can tolerate him hafing bad mood... maybe because of the recent stocks market... but den... somehow his acts not only show his mood, it show his immoral, inethical side... and i really despise him... so sorry to sae that... the person who groom to be who i m... yet... at this point of time... when i m clear of what is right from wrong... he shows me his very inethical... very immature side... doing really stupid things. For example... an "L" plate car infront which was just moving a bit slower... however to me the driver is just being cautious... he can actually honk the car and try to cut in front of it while we were turning right... i mean... it's so dangerous... he should know it better than me... and i thought only a hooligan will do that... cant believe everything... sitting beside him... i felt disgrace... and i really haf the thot that i will rather take my own transport to school... cos i dun want to die in his car... 'cos it is not the first time i sat in dere feeling i may die in dere... there is so many things that upset me when i c him do it... i noe... he is my dad... and sometimes he still show his caring side... the way he used to be... but... y is he like that??? i m already trying to make my life a bit happier... trying to pursue wat i like... yet... at home... when i looked at him... i just feel so sad...

i just need a space to complain... afterall i think everything will be fine... just haf to work it out... but i m really irritated... and now irritated with everything...

havent been trapped in a lift before... today finally got the "once in a lifetime" experience... was still half awake when i entered the lift. There is private sale at isetan todae and so daddy had a hard time find a parking space.. so, decided to drop me off at the lift first... never did anyone thot that the lift will break down and got me stucked in dere to be even later for my oil painting lesson. i got in the lift.. didnt even press anything... and den the lift hanged in mid-air... yohoo... half awaked... i m really expressionless... just couldnt believe that it actually happened... luckily i m not alone.. was with this couple and their father i guess. The uncle was a joker lah... keep joking... asking what his wife will like to eat for breakfast... thinking that we will trap there the whole night. And den auntie was nervous... trying to get herself in a more comfortable position in case the lift dropped... like the hollywood house of terror... haha. I didnt think so far... didnt thot that i m going to stay in that lift for too long... trusted the technicians so much... haha... while the lift really did fall... and i thot i was rather steady... Unlike when i played all those rides in the amusement parks... i didnt closed my eyes or try not to scream... i just plainly stood there... waiting for it to drop... but i think if it did drop all the way to level 1, we are all going to die... Thinking 'bt it... if i m ever going to be in that scenario... there is so much i want to do before i die... whole list of last words... haha... well... i m safe now... n i m never going to take that same lift ever again... if i ever remember to... haa...

my dear cesim... results for the third last round... and we are still on the decline... this is really a stupid game... and basically the trial round doesnt help at all... if u bang rite... den u will first... if u r unlucky... like us... no strategies will work... and this is so demoralising... it is in a mess rite now... i dunno wat we r doing... which direction should we proceed on... LOlz... it is suppose to be a game... but not fun at all... only 2 subject this sem... yet... it is like tt... not meaningful at all... drawing shoes, watching tv, sleeping are full time... studying is part time... haha

Since last week... have this acute pain around my the middle of the ribcage... isit the gastric area... den the shifted to the heart area... definitely not the breast... it is the heart!... keep feeling that smth got stucked there... and it really hurts when i breathe, eat and especially drink... i dont think it is gastric pain... cos i m quite sure i haf been eating quite rite recently... suddenli fear that i will contract some kind of disease... cos nobody seems to know what is it and how to cure it... went to our family doctor wif my parents since they are going to test their blood... i think the doctor also dunno wat is it.. she gave me some gastric medicine... tho i dunno how is it linked to it... ate the medicine... feeling better... but still hurts when i drink hot drinks or i eat fast...

have been quarrelling with my dad recently... he is in really weird mood... as the market swings so does his mood... always feel bad after the quarrelling... but we are always fine after half a day... both of us know we dun mean it when we quarrel... but i just cant stand it and wanted to talk back lo...

been learning my oil painting for a year plus le... it is ex... but it is my dad that have been supporting me financially... am glad that my teacher invited me to a tea session... a critique session actualli... never been to one before... but i guess it will be enriching... too bad it clashed wif my school cirriculum... falls on tuesday... which is the only day i haf to attend school this week... my mum have been asking when i m stopping my lesson... reluctant to stop... but i will have to... nothing is forever... shall move on to smth else that i have always wanted to do... knitting maybe... haha...